Popular Heroes Who Did Not Make It in DOTA

Been MIA for quite some time already, my blog must be growing mushrooms by now...

Here's a mini update.

Enjoy.

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A few of the missing underdogs who didn’t make it...

Hero 1: Michael Jackson

Hero Description:

MJ was taunted as one of the best agility hero yet to make an appearance in Dota Sentinel. His swift dance moves can easily dodge enemy's attack. On top of that his masking abilities allow him to be either black (at night) or white (in daytime).

Hero Skills:

1. Crotch attack - Disabling attack...but works only on male hero.

2. Break dance - +99% Evasion (most effective against dodging tinkers missile attack)

3. Black & White - Camouflage effects.

Ultimate: Moon Walk. A combination of Windwalk + Luna's eclipse makes u go Uh hoo!!

Why this hero didn't make it:

-MJ tends to lose concentration when opponent players are little boys.

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Hero 2: Osama Bin Laden

Hero Description:

Osama was supposed to be the next big hit with scourge players. His experience as a top terrorist paid off when he is drafted as one of the potential intel based nuke hero. (please note though Osama starting base intel is -1)

Hero Skills:

1. Car bomb - Powerful destruction skill with superior AOE. Cheap too.

2. Terrorist Kidnap - Locks enemy hero for a period of time depending on the amount of gold ransom paid.

3. Al-Jazeera - Using satellite network to broadcast enemy hero's movement.

Ultimate: 911 A powerful skill that summons two Boeing 747s to bring down enemy's towers.

Why this hero didn't make it:

-Osama is prone to go MIA (missing in action) whenever the action begins.

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Hero 3: Saddam Hussein

Hero Description:

A close ally of Osama and also a potential scourge hero but Saddam is all about strength. His brute force is terrifying and together with his fat stomach, he can be a good tanker.

Hero Skills:

1. Human Shield - Hiding behind a wall of human shield, Saddam gets bonus armor (+10 or depending on number of people blocking).

2. Chemical Ali - Release poisonous gas that reduces armor and mildly stinks.

3. Conceal - Ability to hide all weapons on his item list and sometimes hide himself.

Ultimate: WMD Weapon of mass destruction, though this is yet to be confirmed.

Why this hero didn't make it:

-Saddam is afraid of binding skills like Rhasta's shackles or anything that resembles a rope.

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Hero 4: George Bush

Hero Description:

Bush comes from a long tradition of pathetic heroes (I meant patriotic heroes) and considers himself a sentinel even U.N. protested against it. Bush is more of a support hero type just like in real life he supported war on terrorism, war on Iran, war on Afghan, war on Pakistan, etc. all kind of wars.

Hero Skills:

1. Ally Attacks - Summon allies to help whenever in danger (condition: the ally hero must be Tony Blair).

2. War-on-Terror - Anti timestop skill specifically aimed at Dark Terror (for being so gay in late game).

3. UN Inspection - Ability to find all hidden weapons belonging / not belonging to Saddam and sometimes find Saddam himself.

Ultimate: Presidential Re-Election Similar to Skeleton King's reincarnation, Bush can revive himself from the dead and terrorize enemies again. (Same skill used by George Bush Snr. but cooldown is every 5 years)

Why this hero didn't make it:

-A part of him made it actually. Think fire Bush.

Hero 5: Sammy Vel**

Hero Description:

Sammy is practically and undead. Having outlived all legal lifespan for human, Sammy still has the vitality of a Bollywood star, all thanks to his Magic, Incantation & Conjuring (read: MIC) Powers. Sammy is therefore classified an Intel hero.

Hero Skills:

1. Raise Toll - Summon expensive Trolls to help Sammy farm for more gold.

2. Leak - Similar to mana leak but this skill is aimed at leaking enemies gold. (and sometimes leaking roof).

3. Collapse - A powerful spell that causes Building or Bridges to collapse and cause damage to enemies.

Ultimate: Finger Point Unlike Lion's finger, Sammy's finger point allows him to transfer all the blame (I mean damage) caused by enemy onto him to another unsuspecting hero allowing Sammy to live and fight another day.

Why this hero didn’t make it:

Sammy is currently focused on practicing all kinds of voodoo magic to help him rejuvenate his HP. (HP - Hair Problem)

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Hero 6: David Beckham

Hero Description:

Beckham is chosen to be a Dota hero, not because of his good looks, tattoos or his gay voice. The truth is, Beckham was chosen just so we get to see more of Posh Spice's boobs. Beckham's global market reach is already tempting Blizzard to consider making David Beckham endorsed Plate Mail Street Wear, Potion Cola & Tango Snacks.

Hero Skills:

1. Free Kick - A swerving blast of energy with a range of 40 yards leaving the enemies defense all stunned.

2. Penalty Miss - A passive skill combining armor penalty + evasion is powerful enough to send enemy heroes running (and also send England out of Euro 04)

3. England Call Up - Beckham summons his England teammates like Lampah, Jialat & Looney to fight the enemy. Last for 90 seconds.

Ultimate: Victoria Secret Beckham can unleash the power of Victoria Adam's singing causing enemy's ears to bleed non stop. At level 16, the rest of the Spices Girls joins in. (Think Naga's Song of Siren + Seeker's Rupture).

Why this hero didn’t make it:

Beckham has switched from playing football with Real Madrid to playing Division 3 hockey with LA Galaxy. He is seriously considering a career change to acting in the next Hollywood blockbuster Bang it like Beckham.

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Hero 7: Tom Cruise

Hero Description:

Beckham's best mate in Hollywood, Tom Cruise is one of our favourite star known for his action stunts and also the sex scenes in Eyes Wide Shut (check it out). Tom's natural ability to swing from one Hollywood chick to another makes him a perfect Agility hero.

Hero Skills:

1. Mission Impossible I - Tom hides a bomb that can make to resemble any item (example a tango or a branch) amongst enemy hero's item. The fake item self destructs in 5 second unless being dropped by the enemy. So think twice when you see a divine lying on the ground.

2. Mission Impossible II- Tom has the ability to swing an invisible rope and slide into enemy's ground without being detected. (Though this may result to a ban if backdoor is not allowed) If trained to perfection, Tom can be hanging from enemy's fire bush (without getting fried) and steal items from the chicken.

3. Mission Impossible III - Tom repeats the same stuff in MI: 1 and MI: 2

Ultimate: The Last Samurai In the event all of his teamates are dead and he is facing an impending gang bang, Tom performs the Harakiri and calls for a 'fast game pls' or 'remake'.

Why this hero didn’t make it:

Being a scientologist, Tom refuse to believe in hero's skill like Zeus's Thundergod's Wrath or Sven's God Strength resulting to unnecessary feeding.

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I find it hillarious and hope that you will find it hillarious too, that of course, you must have basic knowledge of Dota.

-Credits to Westside-

Dilemma

Outside Secret Recipe

Timothy: Happy Birthday!
Me: Thanks!

More and more friends arriving; shook hands after exchanging birthday wish and thanks. When it is Daniel’s turn, we shook hands and…

Me: Happy Birthday!
Daniel and Me: !?

Everyone roared with laughter.

Thanks a lot Daniel, Donny, Pauline, Pei Sze, Siaw Wei, Siew Yong, Timothy and Wan Yan for celebrating my birthday with me. I appreciate it very much! :)

Also, thanks everyone for the birthday wishes!

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During class hours, it was just another day. Class ended in a blink of the eye and its time for choir club.

It was Shu Chan and my birthday, so the members of the choir club sang the ‘Happy Birthday’ song before starting the usual practice.

Nothing much happened until I received a sms from Siew Yong telling me that there will be a gathering at Secret Recipe. There I met a number of my ex-classmates, Daniel and I talked like no tomorrow until we were cut off by the rest, telling us to place our orders.

Timothy brought his girlfriend along and I’d say she stands at 4.5 out of 5 points if I am to rate her; the majority are likely to agree with me that she’s gorgeous. Apparently she came out halfway during a dinner and had to go back in a short while.

After spending like 2 hours in Secret Recipe, the majority decided the next stop would be the Kuching Festival. Since I had not been there yet, I’d give a shot for it. Daniel, Timothy and Donny were the ones driving. So we split into groups of 3 and proceed to our destination.

Still the same old spot like last year, nothing changed, all the same (Donny went to meet his girlfriend while the rest of us explore the stalls). Time seemed to pass by so swiftly until someone pointed out that it’s getting late and Siew Yong had to be back at home before 11pm.

Timothy sent Pei Sze and Siaw Wei home while Daniel sent Siew Yong home. The remaining 4 of us – Daniel, Pauline, Wan Yan and I went to the KIA aka poikeeteo. There we talked about relationships and relationships and anything related to relationships.

The clock struck twelve, It’s Wan Yan’s turn to go home. Pauline insisted on staying back to talk but then she went home too the moment the car reached her house.

With the relationship topic fresh in mind, I asked Daniel about her and he told me what I needed to know and joining his story and my own story to get the picture of what is actually going on.

I told him that:

I was forced to wake up early in the morning somewhere around 5.30am when my handphone notified me of an incoming sms. Out of curiosity wondering who sent a sms at this hour, I checked the inbox.

She sent a ‘birthday song’ sms. Of course I’m glad about it but thinking that I must be dreaming, I left my handphone back to where it was and continued to sleep. 3 hours later, after realizing that it wasn’t a dream, I proceed to thank her for the birthday wish.

Instead of hearing something positive, he said: “You only thank her and that’s all?”

What else should I do then? It would be weird to talk more than that.

In his opinion, the sms she sent must have been special since it was sent early in the morning, likely the first thing she did after waking up. He also said that it won’t directly occur to her to just send me a sms without proper planning. He had his point.

But then in my opinion, this is just a normal greeting to me since it is normal for her to wake up as early as 5 in the morning and nothing more than that. There is a high chance that both minds do not think alike. Meaning to say that if I took it seriously while she took it casually, it would be like what my friends used to say in mandarin: Zhi(4) Zuo(4) Duo(1) Qing(2).

Thinking back, I had stopped smsing with her daily for like 10 months after something unpleasant happened even though the previous conflict had been cleared. During those 10 months, many had happened but in the end he said everything is now stable. He also told me that maybe I should take the first step instead of just waiting. I ever considered it before but then deep in my heart I would not want the same thing to repeat again.

Indeed a few of my friends pointed out that I never showed any special interest in any girls. The reason is because she is still in my mind. The same girl Kelvin and Jeff asked about during ‘Truth or Dare’ on Irene’s birthday last year. I wonder anyone realized I was startled when the question was thrown at me. Nevertheless, I answered it calmly, removing the doubts from the faces staring at me.

Yes I know this is a one-sided feeling. I doubt I will get any response or reply from the other side but I never bothered about it. I like it this way – staying single and sometimes recalling those fond memories in Form 2. That alone is sufficient for me to face any day.

Tagged by SP

1. Do you ever lie about your age?
>No point in lying, no one can escape from aging.

2. Do you prefer “sensitive girls” or “tough girls”?
>Both, but not to the extreme.

3. Do you prefer blonde or dark haired girls?
>Dark haired, though blonde hair looks nice.

4. Are you currently single?
>Definitely.

5. How many things in your past do you regret?
>I wonder...

6. Do you have a best friend?
> Define best friend.

7. What do you want to be when you grow up?
>An engineer or anything related to my field.

8. Who was the last person you hugged?
>My mum.

9. Have you ever had your heart broken?
>Yes and I’m not upset, there’s a long story behind it.

10. Have you ever thought about having plastic surgery?
>Never.

11. Do you like your life?
>Yes and no.

12. Do you shop at Hollister?
>http://www.google.com.my/search?hl=en&q=hollister&meta= ?

13. Has one of your friends ever stolen a girlfriend from you?
>I never met my girlfriend before, for 2 years. What a joke.

14. Has one of your friends ever stabbed you in the back?
>Yes, not one but many.

15. Do you have more friends that are girls or boys?
>1:1 ratio

16. How long have you had friendster?
>Forgot.

17. Have you ever cheated on someone?
>Yes.

18. Has anyone ever cheated on you?
>Definitely.

19. Have you ever slapped a girl in the face?
>“Slapping” with disco dust during end of semester in secondary school.

20. What is one of your biggest fears?
>Bored to death.

21. Have you ever skipped a class?
>Yes, not one but many.

22. Has anyone close to you ever passed away?
>Yes. My beloved uncle, probably the uncle I favored the most among the others.

23. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?
>Maybe I did, or didn’t.

24. Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head?
>Yes, but couldn’t be bothered unless I am too free.

25. Do you believe in the saying “once a cheater, always a cheater”?
>Everyone is a natural-born cheater, the only difference is whether they got caught or not.

26. Have you ever had a good feeling about something and it turned out that you were right?
>Yes.

27. Do you ever wish you were famous?
>I intend to keep a low profile.

28. Do u ever wish u were a girl?
>Only when I wish to understand girls more.

29. Do you think women smell nice in perfume?
>Yes, but not too strong ones.

30. Tag 5 people...
>Since most bloggers I know of are already tagged, then let this be one dead end, sorry.

Tagged - 5 Complains

1st – Studying

Why can’t I just have a natural will to study? When it comes to studying or doing homework, I will do anything to fill up my time. Anything except studying.

2nd – Self-control

I knew I don’t have self-control years ago. A few examples would be playing games non-stop even though my body is feeling uncomfortable from sitting on the same spot for hours and hours; During CNY, I’d eat as many mandarin oranges as I am allowed to (5-10) each day and ended up staying in the toilet. Why can’t I have control over myself?

3rd – Shortage of sleep

As title says. Ironic that a 2 hours sleep is sufficient for me. I know I know, my nickname during secondary school years was ‘Ah Pek’ meaning old man, and an old man needs only a few hours of sleeping time. My parents kept complaining that I had insufficient sleeping hours and I should change the habit of sleeping late and waking up early in the morning but what can I do? My body automatically wakes up itself after few hours time.

4th – Lack of concentration

I find it hard to concentrate on what is important and easy to concentrate on the least important ones – nearly impossible to concentrate on studies but gaining full concentration whenever I am facing a computer.

5th – So hard to think of complains

This one took loads of time to think of. Actually I have nothing to complain about, I am contended with my life and the way it is. Just that there are times when I felt that it is important to change my current lifestyle.

Tag 5 persons:

Since most of the bloggers I know of are already tagged, therefore, whoever is reading this will be tagged.